Babygirl

  There are similarities between a baby girl and that of a young child, but the similarities stop there (baby girl/Daddy Dom is NOT an incestuous relationship). As a young child admires and respects her Father, so does a baby girl. A young child also requires lots of attention and affection, as does a baby girl. . A Daddy  Dom will treat His baby girl as His most prized possession, one that He guards with His life. A young child also longs for guidance, a Daddy naturally teaches His girl all that He knows, all that He wishes her to be. A baby girl longs to learn and if allowed to question that which she doesn't know or understand, enabling a Daddy to guide her, fulfilling His need as well.
I am submissive by nature, I always have been. Some may see that as a weakness, when in reality it has enabled me to live a life pleasing to both myself and others. A submissive oftentimes takes on roles in her everyday life that may seem contrary to her submissive nature, be it in her professional life or personal life. A girl's ability to listen to others wants and needs, her flexible nature and her need for 'peace' in her life, all promote success in her career and ability to raise a family. It is though, her relationship with her Daddy, when she is allowed and expected to be herself, that is most fulfilling to her submissive nature.

In order for a baby girl to truly be herself with her Daddy, its vital that she find the One that she trusts completely and without hesitation. This trust starts outside of the 'dungeon'. Her trust must be unwavering and is a necessity before the relationship can be fulfilling for B/both. A girl's submission and trust is her gift to her Master, a gift that must never be tarnished by her Daddy. A Daddy is unwavering and consistent, which allows you to trust without hesitation. you know you've found the One meant for you when you can say and honestly feel as though there is nothing that your Daddy would ask, that you'd not do.

Communication is a gift that a girl gives her Master

It is said, by many within the BDSM community and the ‘vanilla’ or traditional lifestyle as well, that communication is key to a successful relationship. Honesty and Trust is the foundation for the ability to communicate openly. Sometimes it seems that this trait is assumed by many to be the norm in a BDSM relationship. It oftentimes is skirted over as something easily offered and expected by a Master of His girl. He is of course correct in His assumption of the expectation for her to be honest and open with her feelings but it is at times difficult for her to do so.

 i have found that in order to be completely open, i must first realize what feelings are deep within myself. Sometimes they haven not been pleasant ones (i.e.: impatience, jealousy, frustration). Sadly, i have found that is much easier to act upon these feelings by being flippant, disobedient and sometimes even rude, than it is to have the self-control i long for.

It takes great insight and strength for a Master to deal successfully with these bottled up emotions. It is after all, His place to call her on it, to understand that her actions may be deeper seeded than simply of a psychical nature (temper tantrums and the like).

When you are allowed to talk, to cry, to tell Daddy your deepest, darkest secrets and fears, you are truly set free and express who you genuinely are. A Daddy guides you and molds you into what He knows you are capable of being. It is not that He is unsatisfied with who you are currently, it is that He gains much satisfaction in watching your growth. As you are allowed to express everything you feel, you begin to slowly blossom into the rare and beautiful creature He saw in you , something you've never seen in yourself . When you are able to communicate all that you are , all that you feel and all that you long for, your  Master is the Benefactor. With great pride, He watches as you open each petal and accept each suggestion, blooming into the submissive He knows you've longed to be .
Safe Haven
Am i the only one who leads a hectic life? Trying to juggle one’s career, family, home and all the responsibilities that encompass such, can make you tired just thinking about it!
Yet there is one place, i know i can always find serenity. Within my Daddy’s arms, in His words, in the comfort of His presence, i call home.

Those outside the lifestyle might look at a submissive and consider her to be weak. Those of us within the community realize the sheer strength it takes to submit completely and without question. In order to be a part of that “exchange of power”, a girl has to feel completely safe with Whom she chooses to call Master.

I feel it necessary to explain this ‘safe haven’ concept, once again from my own perspective, be it right or wrong, it is simply the experience I’ve had when it comes to Daddy Dom's and babygirl subs and my relationships in the past . I entered the lifestyle may as well say at birth , I was raised to please " man " by an overbearing Mother whom thought it was best for me to serve than to be served . Her own power trip for having to have had given birth to me or something in her own twisted mind , but as time went by I found bdsm was my lifestyle , I lived it for many years without even knowing it was an organized ( for lack of a better word ) lifestyle  and then i realized there was a community that accepted what I am and longed to be. I’ve spent years watching how others were and are treated , and been protected by some not so caring Daddy's and so called Masters .  Unfortunately, I  learned that not all are who they claim to be.  ( Not every good Master is a safe one and not all safe Master's are good One's ) For those experiences, I am forever grateful, for I came to realize what I was not looking for, as well as what I was.  My best piece of advice would be , be patient , watch and listen because  the moment you meet your Daddy,  you'll know He is the One.  Slowly,  develop a friendship, and when He deems it time, began a relationship.
And you'll find your safe haven

10 Considerations for Aspiring Dominants

1. Be Patient

Until you enter into a relationship with a submissive, you have no right to order him/her around. Give your sub, time to get to know you and what you are like. Finesse and subtlety are major elements of dominance. Similarly, strength and gentleness go hand in hand. The sensitivity and awareness (or lack thereof) that you show in the real world is likely to be repeated in the playroom.
2. Be Humble

You may be God’s/Goddess’ gift to the world, but no one needs to hear it or wants to hear it. You will have ample opportunities to show how good you are - and plenty of opportunities to make a fool of yourself . No matter what you claim, the “real you” will show through in a scene. Don’t set yourself up for a failure by developing expectations that you know you can never reach.
3. Be Open

Although the top is classically considered to be the teacher in D/s-SM, you can always learn from your bottom, no matter how inexperienced. Be willing to learn from other dominants who may have a totally different perspective from yours. Try to approach by-now-familiar trips with an attitude of wonderment and discovery. Be aware that everyone has her or his own personal style.
4. Communicate

You are responsible for finding out basic, essential information about the people you play with, such as experience, limits, likes and dislikes, and health information. Playing D/s-SM without this knowledge is like Russian roulette. Talk about your head-space and your view of D/s-SM with your bottom, so that any uncertainties can be dealt with before you start playing. Clearly spell out roles, rules, limits, and contracts. Do not take for granted that your bottom instinctively knows the ground rules.
5. Be Honest

If you lack experience in an area that your bottom would like to experiment with, be honest about it. Your partner has a right to know that. Be honest with yourself and take your submissive only to those levels at which you are completely in control of the situation. Safety should always be the first concern, taking priority over how hot a particular scene is.
6. Be Sensitive

There’s a very fine line between a sensitive, caring dominant and a self-righteous, insensitive overbearing clod. Your scene should be a creative synthesis of your needs and fantasies and your bottom’s needs and fantasies. Although, on the surface, your submissive is serving you, what actually is happening is that dominant and submissive are serving each other. Earn the complete trust of your submissive and never violate or even threaten to violate that trust. His or her submission is a gift to you. Use it appropriately.
7.Be Realistic

End the scene with the bottom wanting more, not wishing there had been less. Remember that power, control, and sensitivity are the keys, not just the intensity of the stimulation. Be clear about what is fantasy, and has little to do with what works in practice. Your favourite porno picture books may be stimulating in themselves, but don’t try to imitate them to the last detail.
8. Be really Dominant

Submissives are looking for someone who will take over their body and mind, not just for brute strength. Real people are wanted, not just cardboard images from cigarette ads or macho stereotypes. Your dominance enhances your whole existence. It does not cover up or substitute for other areas of your life - it is you. Respect and trust are a two way street for the sub to to you, they must receive and give both trust and respect. Follow up on rules, expect obedience, and punish appropriately when it is called for. Don’t shirk your responsibility to your bottom or to your sister/fellow tops. Be dependable and expect dependability. You have agreed to take the dominant role - now take it!
9. Be Healthy

Like any strenuous activity, SM requires that its participants be in top physical and emotional health. Many factors, including the amount you sleep, your eating habits, and your alcohol and drug intake affect your performance and endurance during a scene. Don’t attempt to do SM when your physical or emotional energy is low. As a dominant you have a special responsibility to be in control of yourself and on top of the scene. An attitude of “drugs and alcohol don’t affect me that much… I can do it anyway” violates your submissive’s trust in you and can be dangerous. If you don’t want to accept the responsibilities, you shouldn’t be playing the game!
10. Have Fun

After all, sex is all about having a good time. You have earned, and you are entitled to the unique, intense pleasures which come from responsible, creative SM play.
THE UNWRITTEN LAW: If your sub says the safe word, play stops. If play is not consensual it is abuse and you can be charged!!






Originally posted by fortheloveofsub

7 Fundamental Characteristics of A Daddy Dominant

 "Age play and Daddy play are often misunderstood to those outside of the kinky community.  One can assume the role of Daddy/Mommy or boy/boi/girl regardless of their actual age or gender."

  The article below from guest author, Fetlife’s WizarDavid, gives a very accurate peek into the relationship of a Daddy Dominant and Babygirl.

Just what is a Daddy Dom? Well, to start with, a Daddy Dom is first and foremost a Dom. He chooses the subcategory of “Daddy” within the lifestyle of dominance and submission (D/s). Let’s get one thing out of the way right at the beginning. A Daddy Dom does not promote incest or pedophilia as the kink may be misunderstood by ignorant people. Rather, in this specific subcategory, the dynamic is set up for the male dominant to be called “Daddy,” and the female submissive (sub) to be called “girl,” “little girl,” or “babygirl,” etc. Rarely is she called “daughter,” as this evokes too many parallels to incest, which Daddies and their girls detest. And while some doms and some subs may have been victims of family violence, incest, or other abuse, Daddy Doms and their girls are not overrepresented in these categories any more than the general population.

The following are some of the fundamental characteristics, and indeed needs, that all Daddy dominants seem to share universally:

1.  Her Number One Fan, the Daddy usually believes in his girl more than she herself does, and often uses the wisdom of his age to see her not only for who she is, but also for who she can become. A Daddy’s eyes light up when his girl enters the room. He is proud of her and praises her for not just for what she accomplishes, but for what she attempts, and for who she is. He accepts her for who she is, flaws and all.

2.  And he knows all her flaws because he is also her ultimate Confidant, allowing her to bare her soul to him beyond all others. She may have many different relationships and types of friends in her life. But Daddy will be her “umbrella confidant.” The one with whom she can talk about absolutely anything and trust that what she tells Daddy stays with Daddy. He is the one from whom she withholds nothing. The one who doesn’t mind if she needs to call and talk at 3am.

3.  He is the Protector of his girl against real or perceived threats, dangers, and bad people. Sometimes a little girl just needs to curl up in Daddy’s arms and smile at some of his bluster, and sometimes the Daddy may have to act on his protective instincts. Pity the person who messes with a Daddy’s girl.

4.  Her Teacher and mentor shows her new things that come from a longer and possibly wider set of life experiences. Daddy likes to take his girl to places she has never been, feed her foods she has never eaten, and do activities she has never enjoyed before. He is never so happy as when he can look in her eyes and know he has given her something she has never had before. This also translates into sexual adventurism for some Daddy/girl couples. He symbolically deflowers her on a regular basis, whether that be sexual or just in exposure to new life adventures.

5.  He wants to be her Guide and advisor. As the girl makes her way in the world, Daddy wants to be there to answer her questions, calm her fears, make her insecurities go away, and give her sound advice based on his years of experience.

6.  Anchor. The Daddy dom is an unyielding, unmovable anchor in the storm. No matter what happens in the girl’s life, she knows her Daddy will be right there where he has always been, and she can hold onto that even if she is blinded by her own tears. Daddies know the storm will pass, and she will be safe, but she needs something to hold onto that will not move.

7.  Disciplinarian. When the girl acts badly, she expects to be disciplined or punished for the infraction. Most Daddy dominants find it occasionally difficult to keep this up, especially as the affection for their girl grows. They would love nothing more than to spoil their girls, but they realize this is the path to ruin. One a girl begins to believe she can manipulate Daddy, she no longer sees him as her dominant, unyielding anchor. A girl needs the stability and protection of a man who is more dominant than she is. To demonstrate that characteristic, Daddies must sometimes be excessively strict and rigid, more so than they would in normal relationships. The act of disciplining the girl may be used as part of a sadomasochistic activity.

In addition to these practically mandatory characteristics, some couples add their own sadism and masochism to the mix, and may use the concept of the wolf or lion and little lamb to describe the way in which the Daddy simultaneously protects his little girl from the world, and yet wants to dominate and devour her sexually. As a sadist, he may create the very tears that he will later kiss away. Sounds sweet, and yet terrifying, if you are not accustomed to the world of sadomasochism in which these participants operate. But to a Daddy and his girl who are into BDSM, this is the most perfect of scenarios they can imagine to act out their fetish.

Daddies come in many flavors, just as their girls do. Some Daddies may have polyamorous girls who have male and female lovers, and Daddy may be that one person outside the polyamory “family” who does not judge her. A Daddy and his girl might not have a sexual relationship at all. Since this is typically a D/s construct, there is usually a sexual component, but as can be seen from the above list of characteristics, sex is not the largest factor or the motivating force in this type of relationship. A Daddy may have more than one girl, may be married and have a girl, too, or may have other types of combinations. But it is rare for a girl to have more than one Daddy.

It is said that “a Top is for tonight, a Dominant is for as long as she is submissive, a Master is there until she is no longer a slave, but a Daddy is forever.” Daddy may have to give his girl away to a husband. He may eventually run out of things to teach his little girl. She may ultimately not need his sage advice and his experience any more. Hopefully he will be too old by then to have to deal with it, because when there is nothing left to teach, no need for a confidant, no discipline needing to be meted out, when his little girl no longer needs her Daddy, that’s when he will die inside. The need that Daddy has for his girl is every bit as potent as the need she has for her Daddy.

A Daddy usually knows he is one. He doesn’t have to be convinced of it, or taught how to be a Daddy. He may only need to have his innate Daddy characteristics pointed out to him. It might happen in the throes of a sexual activity when she exclaims “Daddy” for the first time, and the light goes on. Similarly, the little girl usually knows she needs a Daddy without having to be taught how to be his little girl. Once they identify themselves as Daddy/Little Girl, the draw is more powerful than many other forms of attraction, because it is rooted in deep-seated and old emotions that may not have any other outlet.

Girls in this lifestyle do not act like little girls in their normal work lives. They do not bring teddy bears to work. Indeed many are older women who are very assertive and successful in the business world, but need this special place to get nurturing and comfort lacking in their careers. A Daddy might not necessarily act parental or fatherly in his normal work life either. For some it may be role playing, for some it is a secret lifestyle, and other couples delight in the joys of unabashedly practicing the Daddy/girl dynamic in public. In any case, it evokes deep-seated needs and emotions for both parties, and is a very powerful dynamic.

While some of these characteristics could easily be applied to any good male-female relationship, there are some that require something quite different than the “50/50 partnership” that is so often touted as the most healthy. This is not 50/50. This is a Dominant/submissive relationship, and all the characteristics should be viewed through the lens of D/s.

And while many of the characteristics could also be easily applied to any good D/s or Master/slave relationship, there are some characteristics that are decided different. Not all Masters consider themselves their slave’s number one fan or her umbrella confidant. Teacher, guide, and anchor are not necessarily roles that a Master is required to adopt.

This is nowhere near a complete treatise on Daddy/girl relationships. It does not address the possibility that parent-child ego states (Transactional Analysis) are the preferred communication mode. It does not address the “play space” created by the Daddy for the girl to enjoy feeling “little,” or many other aspects that make D/g different from other D/s, M/s and similar dynamics. But this description of Daddy Dom characteristics will hopefully be useful as a baseline explanation of what makes a Daddy tick.


Big thanks to WizarDavid